My son Oz (in 4th grade) brought home some homework covering the study of matter in his 4th grade science lesson. Here’s a couple of lines from the narrative page “explaining” atoms and matter:
And on the next page, they quizzed him, to make sure he’d accepted the anti-materialist dogma. 
When I asked Oz what was wrong with that, he thought for a minute, and then said “They’re in your brain!”
I’ve raised him well.
And while I’m at it: He also noted that he questioned the teacher on the part of the sheet that said all matter was made of atoms, noting that the sun, a miasma of plasma, was really ions and free electrons, and maybe didn’t count as atoms as such.
Thank you, They Might Be Giants.